Motivational Monday: Your life SUCKS!

Well actually...it doesn't, but you seem to think it does.

How many times have you said "FML!" in a situation that seemed like the end of the world? You constantly complain to your friends, family, anyone who will listen about how bad your life is, hoping that they'll side with you instead of seeing it as sad and pathetic. How many rants have you went on? How many times have you went off on a person because they were seemingly too optimistic about life? How many times have you told people, "You don't understand what I'm going through so how could you tell me that my life/ situation isn't bad?"

Is your life REALLY that bad? Think about it. Look around you. Are you wearing clothes? Have food in your belly? A warm bed to sleep in? Are you reading this blog post on your computer or mobile phone? Now think about the last time you gave spare change to a homeless person on the street. Could your life be any worse than that person's? Probably not, but you know what the homeless person has that you probably don't? Appreciation and gratitude.

As you sit at your home, on the couch, ranting on Twitter on your mobile phone, that guy/girl was happy to get that dollar from you to be able to get something to eat for the first time in probably days.

Your life doesn't suck...your attitude does. And I think it's time that you adjusted it before the higher power adjusts your life.

"When it rains it pours. Maybe the art of life is to convert tough times to great experiences: we can choose to hate the rain or dance in it."
        -Joan Marques

Motivational Monday: Jesus, take the wheel

Have you ever been in a situation expecting one thing but then something happens and you are challenged for the better?

As the situation is happening you ask yourself why and how you were chosen to do whatever it is that is needed.

It's easy for us to see the negative in a situation that we didn't ask for. Think about it, if we didn't ask for this then why would it be given? Step outside of the situation for a moment and think about how you were able to accomplish what you did, what you learned as a result, the new resources you gathered. Think about how your character was challenged and how you became a better person because of it.

When you are thrown in situations you didn't ask for to fulfill the prayers you did, instead of focusing on the negative and asking "why me?" Let Jesus take the wheel and grow from the experience. We all know that He is watching but you never know who else is also watching.

Motivational Monday: Get over yourself

Have you ever felt like the victim? Things simply weren't going your way and you felt like the world was caving in on you and no one understood what you were going through? You whine and complain to any and everyone who was willing to listen to your sorry sob story? No matter how much you tried to forget the situation or person who made you upset, you just couldn't seem to...Well guess what?

GET OVER YOURSELF! Stop playing the victim and start playing the victor. You know why you shouldn't cry over spilled milk? Because 1. it's already on the ground and 2. it's easy to clean up. It's too easy to feel sad for yourself when things don't go your way. How about you challenge yourself and be happy...or rather optimistic in tough situations.

Try it! When you are in a tough situation and you feel like you want to cry, yell, and scream remind yourself that you are more than the situation you are in, smile, and move on to things that are in your control...like your attitude.

Instead of crying over spilled milk, clean it up and pour yourself another glass...after all it's just milk.

"When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves."
       -Viktor Frankl

Motivational Monday: Ride or Die

If you like hip hop, you remember when the whole "ride or die" movement was prevalent? It seemed that every "squad" was proclaiming their loyalty and legion to their particular clique, rap label, or rap mogul. Lately, it seems, that "ride or die" has had a new...let's say modernized meaning for me.

Recently, I had some conversations with friends and acquaintances about building a team that not only shares your vision, but is invested in it. SOA Event Concepts now has a team of five, including myself. With each passing day, I am realizing that my team is becoming more and more invested in my brand and because of it I am willing to go that much further for them...kind of like how a mother will go far for her children, I want to take SOA far for my girls.

"You have to appreciate the people that hold you down, and dismiss the ones that hold you back..."
       -Unknown

What and who are you willing to "ride or die" for?

"A man person who stands for nothing will fall for anything."
       -Malcolm X

Motivational Monday: Hardwork Pays Off

Have you ever noticed how people are quick to think that a person's success was instantaneous; how they neglect the fact that that person ha been working tirelessly for several years to get to the point they are now? Or even they don't see the amount of times that person wanted to quit, throw in the towel and make life easier for themselves.

Nobody gets anywhere without putting in the right amount of work. We like to look at how far we have instead of celebrating how how far we've come. Think about where you were when you started versus where you are now. Do you think you go to this point without putting in some sort of hardwork? Do you think that you have received the blessings you have received without working for it?

Our pessimistic nature forces us to think we aren't doing enough, when in actuality we are doing more than enough. Have faith in yourself and believe that what you are doing will be severely rewarded in the end. Enjoy the fruits of your labor by celebrating where you are instead of where you aren't. Hardwork pays off in more ways than one.

"He that would have the fruit must climb the tree."
        -Dr. Thomas Fuller

Motivational Monday: Changing Lives

What have you done today to change someone's life?

I was watching Long Island Medium, pretty fascinated with how Theresa is always compelled...by spirits to provide information to complete strangers that ultimately changes their lives and their way of thinking. What have you done today to change someone's life? Now most of us are not gifted with those powers to speak to spirits, but we are gifted with ways to impact others. I had my first meeting with my lovely five interns for the Summer/ Fall season yesterday. I spoke with them about finding your passion and achieving your dreams. I could tell by talking to these ladies that we had connected and that we were all on a course to change each others' lives.

So many people believe that they are insignificant and can't really impact others and don't have the capabilities to change lives. But I'm here to tell you that you can change someone's life in such a small way that you don't even realize that you are doing so. Whether it be a kind smile, a helpful hand, or sincere advice, the way in which we impact others is a direct reflection of how others have shaped and impacted us.

"The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own."
       -Benjamin Disraeli

Motivational Monday: Kicking Closed Doors

You're sitting in your office. You have this idea or information you KNOW will change the fate of a person or your job. You go to your superior, ready to share this idea or information...but their door is closed. You're discouraged. You start to knock, but fear wraps you in a snug blanket. You start to turn around...going back to your desk, but something inside of you tells you to go back...kick that closed door. Do you listen?

Life is like that. It gives you an idea, information or a resource that could change the very situation you are in. Often times what stands between the idea and the execution is the closed door. The closed door represents the obstacles we face to make our dreams, goals, opportunities a realization. We get so caught up in the physical existence of "the door" that we often forget what could be behind it.

When fear (the door) stands in the way of your goal being realized, your dream being executed, that opportunity happening...kick it. KICK. THAT. CLOSED. DOOR. Don't let a closed door stand in your way because the one thing that stands between you, that door, and what's behind it...is your foot and the strength you put behind it.

Motivational Monday: Closed Minds Don't Get Fed

Lately, I've been exercising my open mindedness and helping others to exercise theirs. Yesterday was date night with the soon to be hubby. We drove around the city laughing, people watching, trying to find something to do on a brisk Atlanta day. As it turns out, the theme for our date night was all about getting Hubby to try new things and be open minded. The first thing he tried was this restaurant I've been telling him about. And he helped me to open my mind about what we should do. I had to think, if we both hadn't kept our minds open, we would have missed out on a great day together.

That's the thing, when you close your mind to the endless possibilities, you prevent great opportunities and blessings from flourishing. Think about the last time you started to close your mind to something, changed your mind, and great things started happening. I know if I had closed my mind to going to certain events or meeting with certain people I would not know the great people that I know today. If you had closed your mind to that job offer or unexpected opportunity who knows where you would be!

The gist of it is this, closed minds don't get fed. When you keep your mind closed, you prevent the flow of knowledge, information, and opportunities. The mind itself is a receptacle, always waiting to receive...why would you keep the lid closed?

"It's essential to keep an open mind, and to be willing--better yet, eager--to try new things "
       -Michael Abrash

Motivational Monday: Be a Seed Sower

Yesterday, I watched Joel Osteen. I really enjoyed his sermon about sowing your seeds through helping of others. I've heard many times that the best way to pick your spirits up is by picking up the spirits of others...by being of service to others. Now I know some of us may not have the time to devote constantly volunteering at a local shelter, church, or food bank, but think about the people who are in your daily life that you can simply make sure they are okay. Maybe you can offer them some encouraging words, send them some information guiding them in the right direction, or event give them the gift of an attentive ear.

When we lend out a helping hand to others, the universe lends us a helping hand. I like to think of it as depositing some change into our karmic accounts and receiving interest from the universal bank. How much did you deposit today? What will the interest be in the long run? Nothing is better than getting back more than what you put in.

So today as you begin your week, think about what is going on in your life. Think about the changes you hope to come. Think about whatever you are being challenged by and put that energy towards helping someone else create positive change.

"Sow your seeds in your time of need. Sometimes God won't send us the answers we need, instead he'll send us a seed that holds the answer.
'Trust in the Lord and do good.' (Psalms 37:3)"
       -Joel Osteen

Motivational Monday: Be A Snake Charmer

Last week, I had a dream that I was being followed by a snake. It wasn't just your regular garden variety snake. It was a gigantic python! I'm a huge believer that some of our dreams tell us things that we should be aware of or even predict things to come. Naturally, I woke up baffled by what the dream meant. I saw the snake, it hissed at me, I was frightened and then I woke up. I checked my dream book to see what it meant, but it didn't really offer me any comfort.

Fast forward a few days later, I was speaking to a close associate of mine about how every time they encounter this particular person, there is a constant undertone of hatred, jealousy, and negativity. It got me to thinking about some old sayings about "snakes in the grass." Matter a fact, Southern artist Big K.R.I.T. penned the line

"He said I should cut my grass because I'm surrounded by snakes. Not sure if that was metaphorical or if he had seen one today."

In my opinion, we give too much energy to the snakes. We often worry about who they are, what they're doing, when they'll strike. I think we should learn to be snake charmers. Soothe Sayers whose job is to not be frightened by the snake, not attack the snake, but to charm them

Speaking literally, if you are aware of someone being negativity towards you or "hating" on you...you're not busy enough. You are focusing too much energy on what they are doing and not enough on what you should be doing. Be a soothe sayer, treat them with kindness, don't allow their energy to destroy yours. I'm certain all of us have a snake or two in our midst. The most we can do is be aware and be busy.

"Be so busy that you don't have the time to know who your haters are. And when you know who they are...charm them. Sometimes the best revenge is to smile...and move on."

Motivation Monday: Consistency Kills

By now, we all have heard about the Trayvon Martin situation that has happened in Sanford, FL. And believe me, if it doesn't touch your heart and make you upset...then you've got issues (in my opinion). As I've been watching the news, reading the paper, and listened to the radio about all the outrage and rallies that have taken place since this story hit mainstream news it led me to think. This case is not new.

We've had situations like this since WAY before I was born. It is a situation that resembles has the potential to resemble the Civil Rights Movement. What I mean is that depending on what the people decide to do and continue to do will either be the game changer we need in this county when it comes to not only race relations but also human rights/ human error.

There have been so many recent cases, Jena 6, Sean Bell, Genarlo Wilson, and Troy Davis that had so much momentum in the beginning but as soon as people felt like the fight was lost or that there was nothing more that they could do...all the momentum and noise died. And it makes me sad. The reason why so much change happened in the 60s is because of the high amount of consistency they had to continue the fight. Regardless of if they secretly felt like there was nothing they could do...they STILL. DID. SOMETHING. They remained consistent in their fight to work together in the greater good for the people.

Now this post isn't necessarily about having consistency when it comes to fighting for human rights, but it does shed light on a major problem we have, especially in America, as humans fighting for our rights. We lack consistency...we lack consistency sooooo bad. Think about it. If we would put even half as much energy into consistently shedding light on issues that impact us all, on standing up for what we believe in, on working together for the common good, we could be so far right now.

So implore you, use this opportunity to be consistent in your stance and your believes because when all else fails, the consistency of the people will always prevail.

"It's not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives. It's what we do consistently."
       -Tony Robbins

Motivational Monday: Don't Be A Blessing Blocker

Lately, I've been seeing people who are blocking their own blessings...and I don't think they realize it. So many of us look for a clearly written sign in the skies which prevents us from seeing what's right in front of us.

How often do you see small victories as a preliminary blessing for a bigger blessing? Probably all the time. We are so accustomed to wanting things to be bigger, greater, faster, etc that when we receive something that is smaller, lesser, or slower we ignore it and put it to the wayside.

Before we can achieve big things we have to accept the small victories. Maybe you are in medical school, your big victory is to get your PhD...but your small victory is that you passed that major test or you met someone in your field who can be your mentor. Or maybe you're an entrepreneur. You want to someday own this international conglomerate but today you manage a small firm that has recently started to get more clientele.

My point is this, "Big things have small beginnings. So don't block your blessings because you expect or wish them to be bigger." The small victories add up and those blessings are a set up for the larger ones to come.

When God provides you with a blessing/ opportunity, no matter how big or small appreciate it and show him that you are ready for the bigger blessings to come.

Motivational Monday: High Standards

"Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anyone else expects of you. Never excuse yourself."

       -Henry Ward Beecher

5 Things You Can Do Now to De-stress

So yesterday, I discussed "going through hell". Even though it is a growing and learning process, it is still a stressful one. There are so many things you can do to de-stress and relax that doesn't take much money if any...

1. Unplug and meditate.
   Sometimes, what we choose to tune into causes us to be stressed and we don't realize it. TV "reali-dramas" are made to invoke emotions and cause us to be stirred. I wouldn't be surprised if there is scientific evidence that it raises our blood pressure and lowers our self-confidence. As addicted to social media as we are...a lot of the times it is good to unplug from it. Give yourself a day a week to unplug from the computer, the Facebook, the Twitter, etc and learn to meditate. There is something calming and refreshing about sitting quietly and doing nothing. Not worrying about anything and clearing our minds. And if meditating is too hard for you, read a book or go outside or hang with friends. The best thing about unplugging from the world is that you get a greater sense of the world around you that we ignore when we are so tuned into our devices and problems.


2. Be creative...even if you're not.
   Now I know there are many people who are not naturally gifted in the art of being creative. That's okay. Whether you are creative, artistic, resourceful or wish you were...be creative. Being creative stimulates your mind and has a calming effect. Here's an idea for the non-creative types: go to the dollar store, buy a coloring book and some crayons or colored pencils and give yourself 30 minutes to an hour a day to "be creative." You'll find that you will feel more relaxed every time you start to color.


3. Serve others.
   Nothing is more refreshing than being of service to others. Helping people who are in a worse situation than you helps you to realize how good you really have it. There are ALWAYS opportunities to volunteer and help out, you just have to find the one that you enjoy the most.


4. Treat yourself.
   You can look at this one a number of ways. Treating yourself could mean buying those shoes you've had your eye on for a while and taking yourself out on a really nice date. It could mean treat yourself to time off...from family, friends, work...see #1. Treating yourself is a way for you to give back to the person you may have been neglecting...yourself. Naturally we want to insure that everyone around us is okay, but as a result we neglect ourselves. It's time we learn to make US our top priority...in the end, everyone will benefit from it.


5. Do more of what makes you happy.
   Have you always been athletic but you haven't been on a court is years? Or maybe you used to be a wonderful singer but you gave it up to pursue another dream. Or even running is something that makes you feel alive, but you've neglected the pavement because of kids, work, or whatever. DO MORE OF WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY!

When life gets crazy, how do you de-stress?

Motivational Monday: Keep going through your hell to appreciate life

Why going through hell is necessary.

Have you ever been in such turmoil in your life, such strife, that it seems like God or some spiritual being is picking on you? It seems that as you are starting to see the sunlight, it quickly gets cloudy? I feel like at one point or another we will go through that chapter in our lives...some of us hardheaded people may go through it more than once. As much as we wish we weren't in it, it's necessary for us to go through these pains and pangs in our lives.

Think about it. You will appreciate something more if you have to work hard for it. Remember when you were a kid and your parents bought you a toy just because? Do you remember what happened to that toy? Maybe you left it somewhere or took it apart...some kind of way it ended up in the trash... But when you were given an allowance for completing your chores or had your own money and bought your own stuff, you truly appreciated that thing.Why? Because you had to work hard to get it!

That's how life is. We won't appreciate it unless there is struggle. Yes we appreciate HAVING life, but not all of us appreciate LIVING life until someone or something comes in to shake things up for us. Some of us have to go through the turmoil longer than others, but at the end of the day it's about the lessons you take from them. So as your life becomes laden with bad news, situations, turmoil and strife, don't think of it as God picking on you. Think of it as going through this hell is necessary for me to appreciate what I have, those I love, and living life.

"If you're going through hell...keep going."
     -Winston Churchill

Loving each other before we're gone.

Have you ever lost a person you cared deeply about and wished you had said more to them before they passed? Why do we wait for our loved ones to be gone before we fill ourselves with regret about what we should have done? Why does pride prevent us from saying what we really feel about them. We see it so many times, especially with celebrity deaths. While they're living we take them for granted, focus on their mistakes, make fun of their decisions. Once they leave this Earth, THAT'S when we want to celebrate their greatness and what they've accomplished.

Don't wait until it's too late to celebrate a person's life. Instead of celebrating what they left us with, we need to celebrate them when they are there. If you love someone, they should never wonder if you do. If you call someone your friend and you care for them, they should always be reassured of your loyalty.

So start today, the day after Valentine's Day, to let the people you care about know that you care about them. Whether you say with a card, a phone call, or a message make sure they know that they are in your heart.

A Message from SOA

Motivational Monday: How Do You Want To Be Remembered

By now, the world has learned that music legend, Whitney Houston, has died. It is a sad moment in musical history as well as a sad moment in Black History. Whitney Houston was known for hits like "I Wanna Love Somebody," "I'm Every Woman," and her signature song, the remake to Dolly Parton's, "I Will Always Love You." Whitney Houston is also known for her roles in top movies such as The Bodyguard with Kevin Costner and Waiting to Exhale. Unfortunately, Whitney Houston has had a troubled past with illicit drugs...

Whitney Houston has accomplished so many things in her 48 years of life, but some will remember her for her crazy antics fueled by drugs and alcohol. How would you want to be remembered if you should leave this Earth today? Would you want to be remembered for the things you accomplished? The people you touched? Or the mistakes you made?

As we go through our lives making our own way, allow that question to be a constant mantra for you, "How Do I Want to Be Remembered?" When you are confused about whether or not you should experiment with things or just leave well enough alone, let that be your mantra. When you start to get discouraged because your goals aren't coming to fruition, let that be your mantra. When your peers start to pressure you to be like them, let that be your mantra.

How do you want to be remembered?

"I decided long ago never to walk in anybody's shadow; if I fail or if I succeed, at least I did as I believe."
       -Whitney Houston

Thank you Whitney for allowing us to remember you for that...not walking in anybody's shadow. You definitely succeeded.

Rest in Love.

How To Be Successful by Tyler Perry

Why the Giants beat the Patriots: An Inspirational Essay

If you were like the millions of people around the world watching Superbowl XLVI on Sunday evening, you witnessed the rematch between the New England Patriots and the New York Giants. You witnessed some pretty great plays, mostly in the last quarter. Personally, I was rooting for the Patriots but that is neither here nor there since I really prefer college football...specifically UGA college football. As I watched the game and witnessed countless errors being performed by the Patriots, I definitely had to comment the NY Giants for their consistency.

You see, in life, like the Superbowl we are in a competition. Most of us believe we are in a competition with others (co-workers, business owners, friends), in reality we are in competition with ourselves. We have to constantly try to set the bar higher and higher in order to receive what ever it is we wish to achieve. Often times we lose sight of our original goals and try to create multiple plays to make the same goal come to fruition. Although it can work, depending upon how you go about it, it is not the tool that helps to win games.

The Giants were able to win over the Patriots because "CONSISTENCY KILLS COMPETITION." When you are able to consistently make major plays or game changing plays over your opponent...you win. In your life, when you work at something consistently, your hard work pays off. I can't tell you how many friends and associates have applied this to their life and their goals and came out winning. No matter what you want to create, do, achieve be consistent in it. Even when the odds seem against you, be consistent in what you do.